There I was for the last few weeks worrying and fussing over something or someone. I got myself into a knot and was obsessing about it I guess.
Things came to a head this week and I probably would normally get upset and sad and all that crap about it but this time it was different, I straightened my back yesterday, had a little chat with myself and shrugged the whole thing off.
It is not that it doesn't matter or that I don 't care its just that I will not allow it to dictate how I live the hours of my days.
This morning when I got up everything was clear, my head was free of the thoughts of the last few weeks and I could think clearly, the creative part of my brain was working and some great thoughts and ideas were flooding in.
We celebrated Mass today for a lovely lady who was leaving. The whole thing was beautiful and I could find God in it. I realised I had pushed him away also, he was there in the singing, in the readings in the people beside me and very real in the Mass itself.
When such as I cast out remorse
So great a sweetness flows into the breast
We must laugh and we must sing,
We are blest by everything,
Everything we look upon is blest.
(from a Diary of Self and Soul - WB Yeats)
How could I forget these things? How did I get so immersed in my problems that I could not see out of them.
Tonight I thank God for helping me fix it.
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